tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-77243948379095242712012-01-29T19:36:40.451-08:00Where I continue my 'relentless critique the entire human race'...and that includes you.Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.comBlogger421100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-68361549575514855122011-12-29T18:59:00.000-08:002011-12-30T05:02:36.054-08:00

There are certain problems that go along with moving eight hours away from home ... and another hour and a half away from your original home. One of those problems is that when you're done being angry at everyone and everything, it's no easy task to just go back, to blend in, to make it like it's the good old times again. Because it's not the old times again. It's something new and unfamiliar.

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-66221165278066873452011-08-24T11:11:00.000-07:002011-08-24T11:16:33.460-07:00

Untitled Everything decays Everything crumbles Everything breaks down As it always has (around you) The difference is I can't feel it anymore (around you) This pillar I'm standing on keeps rising up growing, soaring, leaving Farther away from the turmoil of your earth soggy & dark & dank & dead The pillar rises on - made of stone I am made of stone Hard marble, smooth granite Protecting and

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-41110498387947975542011-08-15T14:46:00.000-07:002011-08-15T14:52:03.206-07:00

Chloe Barker sat drinking away her problems in a white, middle class condominium in a pristine beach town in the middle of August. What the pristine beach town did not know, however, was how much Chloe hated it. It was completely unaware that Chloe wanted to write all over it with paint, and then burn it all down, preferably while she was naked and shouting anarchist ideology about the terrible

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-48930607233817464292011-08-08T16:02:00.000-07:002011-08-08T16:51:26.504-07:00

Around 365 days ago I wanted to be a ghost. I wanted to turn into mist. To leave the small dirt encased town I had been merely surviving in and putting up with for so long and disappear to a big, nameless, anonymous city so I too could become nameless and anonymous. I wanted to slip out of people's consciousness and stop existing in the present tense. I violently needed to abandon everyone and

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-728623251751656552011-08-03T19:31:00.001-07:002011-08-03T20:32:20.012-07:00

( It's so hard to write about him without feeling cliche and cheesy and ridiculous and idiotic. But I'm going to try anyways. It's not very original, it's not very clever, but it's something. )I love him.I love him when he's just waking up. When the grey morning light creeps in and pokes at his un-spectacled eyes.I love him when he's about to fall asleep. When I can feel his wonderful body

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-18600101806389239612011-06-27T21:15:00.001-07:002011-06-27T21:18:03.031-07:00

Girls are so much more complicated than guys. Everyone has this idea that men are simple and only need sex and food and sleep, and women are infinitely intriguing creatures that will forever be a mystery. Fuck that, that’s reverse feminism. At the end of the day, we’re all fucked up human beings that have flaws and a subconscious and a tangle of thoughts that cloud our mind. Some of these

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-50564842832011711422011-05-24T18:08:00.000-07:002011-05-24T18:13:32.005-07:00

Seeing you again was like seeing a ghost, some mist from my past that was back again to remind me of who I used to be, of what I used to be. Sneaking peeks and avoiding glances all night, we never said each others names or talked to one another, out of fear that verbal confirmation that we knew each other would send this facade we had silently agreed upon crumbling.No, we never acknowledged each

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-3610847982957229372011-02-25T16:12:00.000-08:002011-02-25T16:24:45.251-08:00

This coffee shop is infested with adults. These are the worst possible kind of adults, too. They’re not old and curmudgeony and bitter to the ways of the world. They’re not 40 somethings that are taking a break from their lives of soccer practice and PTA meetings and mandatory sex for a quick latte to numb the pain. Those are the adults I can handle. While they’re full of shit just like everyone

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-22137476856356552762011-01-12T23:40:00.000-08:002011-01-13T12:07:22.303-08:00

Everyone romanticizes themselves. Some more than others, but at the end of the day, we all have this idea of ourselves that is fairly rosier than reality. I feel like for most of us, we fancy ourselves as characters in a Woody Allen movie. Especially us, the college kids. The one that toss words around like 'avante garde' and 'troubled' and 'fundamentally'. It is this demographic that would like

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-88809230586118751372010-12-16T08:00:00.000-08:002011-02-25T16:19:35.725-08:00

It’s 10 AM on a Thursday morning in Ottawa. As “Main Street” by Bob Seger plays in the cafe, the memory comes flooding back of the last time I heard this song...A few nights before Christmas last year, Dad dragged me down to our seedy and centipede infested basement in Woodstock to show me what he’d been working on for weeks. Past all the boxes that had yet to be unpacked (and possibly never

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-76522543584690730002010-06-19T22:06:00.000-07:002011-02-25T16:19:51.551-08:00

So today I was skimming through the Toronto Star, and I came upon a piece that faired to be (dare I say it) potentially interesting: Robert Cribb, a columnist for the Star, was sent to take his six year old daughter out shopping to your average little kid stores (H&M, Gap Kids, Joe Fresh, the Lollipop Guild's Factor Warehouse) to show the differences between the clothes that little girls like...

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-44349218136253086042010-06-19T21:33:00.000-07:002011-02-25T16:18:42.015-08:00

So I have a personal philosophy when it comes to writing. I feel that many people think that for the most part, a writers job is 'easy' or could be done by anyone, but for me I don't think that statement could be farther from the truth. It takes a certain kind of person to be able to coherently and eloquently translate their thoughts, philosophies, ideas, etc into written word that can not only

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-50311596602253370052010-04-15T17:06:00.000-07:002010-04-15T17:10:57.118-07:00

So in case you are infatuated with what you see here, I thought that you might be interested in my other blog Collectively Chloe. It's essentially just a mish mash of my sketches and photographs that I naively label as 'art'. Check it out here, and enjoy!

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-15696828486916239002010-03-08T21:18:00.000-08:002010-03-08T21:20:00.954-08:00

Just thought I should let all of you know that yes, my annual Oscar Wrap-Up piece is coming! I just have to find the time to finish and finesse it. Thanks for your patience as we all say goodbye to another award season!

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-35543013637423437182010-01-18T20:25:00.000-08:002010-01-18T21:35:29.925-08:00

So by now the Golden Globes have come and gone and all that's left are the remains of a pretty interesting awards show. I've said it before and I'll say it again, the GG's are the award shoe equivalent of dipping your toes into the water to test it: this is just the beginning, and it's a sign of what's to come. So let's get right down to the winners (note that I'm only going to cover the film

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-51988272958866272352009-12-30T10:23:00.000-08:002009-12-30T11:12:05.850-08:00

So as you can tell from my older review of Wall E, I'm kind of a Pixar fan girl. Now, I'm not so much of a fan girl that I can't accept when Pixar makes some not-as-great-as-usual films (Monsters Inc. and Cars wasn't their best, and when I say that I mean it was good, but it isn't their usual level of awe-inspiring great), but for the most part I have accepted that my heart belongs to Pixar, and

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-21076844789658447662009-12-30T08:55:00.000-08:002009-12-30T11:11:24.820-08:00

So it's been awhile since I've done a movie review, but with the new year fast approaching (happy soon-to-be 2010 by the way) I thought that I should return to form and start spending my time in a dark, crowded movie theater sitting behind some crying kid, and wedged between two popcorn loving families that apparently have no sense of the word 'personal space' (or 'personal hygiene', if you want

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-85531900737936544562009-04-28T16:55:00.000-07:002009-04-28T16:57:11.457-07:00

Just thought that I should let all 3 of you who read this know:I have another blog at http://idontknowwhoppers.blogspot.com/ which is mainly for school. BUT I update it more regularly and there are a ton more articles on everything from why College Freshman are lazy to Earth Hour, etc etc.The excitement never stops!So ch-ch-check it out and enjoy!-Coffee Rock 

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-28812557916511093412009-03-26T16:54:00.000-07:002009-03-26T16:56:33.188-07:00

Okay so we all know the story by now: Pope Benedict XVI went to Africa, and told the thousands of people that went to go see him that 'condoms don't help stop the spread of HIV, on the contrary, they only worsen the problem.' I'm paraphrasing, but you get the point: the Pope flat out said that condoms make AIDS worse.What the hell.You don't have to be a scientist to know that this is a completely

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-61437985639228132942009-03-09T18:14:00.000-07:002009-03-09T18:18:03.473-07:00

Ok, so this past weekend was huge for you if you are a) A comic book nerdb) A movie nerd or c) A Literary nerdWhy is this you might ask? Because the greatest graphic novel of all time, winner of the Hugo Award, one of Time Magazines 100 Best Novels of the 21st Century, the 'un-filmable Graphic Novel' was in fact, filmed. It's called Watchmen and it came out in theaters this weekend. And for the

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-23050320752288344952009-01-28T18:52:00.000-08:002009-01-29T18:34:04.970-08:00

Sorry that this is going up a bit late, guys. Please bear with me, but I just thought that its better late than never (right?) to announce the winners of the Screen Actors Guild Awards.Best Outstanding Performance by a Cast in a Motion PictureThe Cast of  Slumdog MillionaireAwesome. From what I hear from...well....EVERYBODY is that I MUST see this movie, or I won't be considered a fully

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-1277545519632287392009-01-13T12:21:00.000-08:002009-01-13T13:26:23.074-08:00

So the Golden Globes are done and over with: after parties have been cleaned up, hang overs cured and all the free food consumed by celebrities. BUT we don't care about that! Any self-respecting person only cares about how close I was with my predictions! Lets get it started, then. This will be set up like my previous article on who I thought will win, with the category followed by the

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-14983005890766677412009-01-11T14:02:00.000-08:002009-01-11T15:24:40.129-08:00

So I have to admit: I'm terrible at these award shows. No, I'm not talking about weather or not I win the heated debates over who had the nicest dress ( I frankly could care less about what garb the celebs have decided to drape over their delicate frames). I mean that I am terrible at guessing who will win what.I'm torn between what I want to win, and what I honestly think will win. This year,

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-34709649854388968032008-12-29T10:16:00.000-08:002008-12-29T10:53:30.862-08:00

So awhile ago (and by awhile I mean months and months ago) I did a piece on the possible revival of vinyl. As we all know, vinyl is the format that our parents used to listen to music, while now a days we kids download everything we listen to, and if not that, function by using compact discs (remember those?!).  I for one am really sick of all of our music being little bits of data that sits at

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-1776704175157192802008-12-29T10:01:00.000-08:002008-12-29T10:12:53.421-08:00

So as you have probably noticed, yours truly hasn't been posting blogs in awhile. Maybe you've been sad to sit down at your computer and realize that 'Hey, whatshername hasn't written anything lately. Boy, do I miss her cynical way of thinking and razor sharp witt.'.....and then again maybe you haven't. But anyways, its true that I haven't been writing a lot lately. I blame this on the fact that

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-35733078289768990682008-11-10T13:30:00.000-08:002008-11-10T14:55:03.082-08:00

Was it Bill Gates who first said 'One day, nerds will rule the world'? Maybe not, but it seems like that day has come and past, and that we are now living in The Age of The Geek, where the coolest thing you can do, is be un-cool.This social movement has been slowly occuring over the past few years, but it seems like this year more than ever the nerd scene has exploded all over North America, and

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-1550963657494840582008-11-09T18:06:00.000-08:002008-11-09T18:59:36.300-08:00

So its official. We can't call the Americans stupid for at least a month. Why? Because for the first time in awhile, the American people have finally voted for and elected a smart person to be their president: Barack Obama.Oh yeah, and he's black, too.I have to say that even though I don't live in the United States, I'm really happy that Obama won. The USA is the most powerful country in the

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-32610442680241769412008-10-11T13:34:00.000-07:002008-10-11T14:10:36.811-07:00

The fine citizens of the US an A below us might celebrate it 7 weeks later than we do, but for Canadians, its Thanksgiving. Now, for awhile, I was highly considering going on a rant about how pointless Thanksgiving actually is. If you think about it, once a year we slaughter thousands of unsuspecting turkeys, eat way more than we actually should, get together with our family, act chummy and nice

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-16689287111145603312008-10-04T13:10:00.000-07:002008-10-04T13:36:07.338-07:00

The title says it all, this is a N&N rant.This weekend, Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist comes to theatres, and unlike every other teen out there that likes to think of themselves as 'witty, clever, obscure, and someone with a good taste in music' I DON'T care about this movie.At all.In fact, its almost safe to say that I despise it.I've seen trailers, I've heard other people talk about this

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-211517303153889282008-09-27T20:20:00.000-07:002008-09-27T21:29:14.197-07:00

So recently, the popular site Rotten Tomatoes published a list of what they thought were the 50 Best Animated films. Unlike most people, I don't live by the word of Rotten Tomatoes. I've discovered other movie review sites that are much more interesting, entertaining, en lightning, etc. But I was curious to see what RT had cooked up this time around, and I took a hesitant look.For the most part,

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-84148792374253162142008-09-20T07:57:00.000-07:002008-09-20T08:06:33.783-07:00

So this is a bit of a follow up to my previous post about Jack White and the Quantum of Solace Theme song.So by now its well known that the dynamic duo of Alicia Keys and Jack White paired up to make the theme for the up coming film...and I was pretty intrigued. Considering their two unique sounds (listen to Bone Broke by The White Stripes and No One by Keys) I was really curious to find out how

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-87354324574369113092008-09-16T19:07:00.000-07:002008-09-16T19:35:18.007-07:00

So recently, Jack White, lead singer and guitarist of The White Stripes, and The Racontuers recorded the theme song to the up coming 007 film, the Quantum of Solace with Grammy award winning artist Alicia Keys.The song that is used for 007 movies is always important, and helps sets the tone, mood etc of the film. Usually its an honour to be picked to help record or contribute to the process, and

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-65249492093765165592008-09-16T10:46:00.000-07:002008-09-16T11:18:49.102-07:00

So by now we all know that John McCains running mate is none other than the Alaskan princess herself Sarah Palin. Plucked from the tundra, Palin has been shoved into the spotlight...along with all her extra baggage....and by baggage I mean scandal. The Pro-Life lovin' govenor has a 17 year old daughter (who happens to also be a mum herself). She hunts caribou, is an ex beauty queen and is read to

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-50274459661544913992008-09-15T18:14:00.000-07:002008-09-15T19:34:00.672-07:00

So I know that this is late and that you've probably already basked in the glory that is Wall - E, but I want to talk about it none the less.It seems that the super duo of Disney and Pixar have done it once again, grinding out another hit of a movie that is sure to entertain adults and kids alike (and even cynical teens like myself).  I have to say it, my icy little heart melted for Wall - E...I

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-15166551482067757912008-07-08T15:06:00.000-07:002008-07-08T15:48:39.729-07:00

I still remember the amazement I had when I was younger as I gently pulled out stacks upon stacks of my dads old LPs. Classics like Genesis's 'Selling England By the Pound", The Beatles' "Magical Mystery Tour' and many, many others (at one time, over 300) had me mystified as I gazed at the trippy and artistic covers and found the ancient and (even then) long dead creatures known as 'vinyl LP's".

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-41520178730099377492008-04-28T18:04:00.000-07:002008-05-11T15:19:36.465-07:00

Okay, so I've finally gotten with the times and I saw Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (film version, recently directed by Tim Burton). And I have to say, after hearing people sing its praise for weeks I was a bit disappointed....mainly because of ANTHONY.Sure, visually it was great to look at. The contrast of the dull and drabness of 1800's London next to the vivid red of blood (

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-10923376026942528202008-04-21T13:52:00.000-07:002008-04-21T14:19:59.005-07:00

So we being the over-aggressive bunch of adolescents that we are were made to sit through a presentation all about bullying. The new twist on this old and much hated tradition was that the 'play' (I use this in the lowest sense of the word, seeing as Shakespeare is turning in his grave right now) mainly focused on cyber-bullying (aka using technology to bully others).From the get-go it was

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-87804483175824611282008-02-12T17:10:00.001-08:002008-02-12T17:46:23.229-08:00

Okay, so to start out: yes. Yes, I am single. But that is not where my hatred for Valentines day spouts.Valentines day is probably the most commercial holiday of the year. It is awkward all around. If you are single, you feel like crap. Even if you have a life, friends, a career and a sense of humour, you are made to feel like you are nothing because you don't have "another half".If you are in a

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-80066494167088794962008-02-01T08:01:00.000-08:002008-02-01T08:30:34.151-08:00

Yes! Finally the tyranny of exams are done and over with, and the new semester is just about to begin! And even though I am extremly happy that exams are over and done with, I am kinda sad to see the first semester go. In a few months, I will officially be halfway done highschool, a thought that honestly scares the crap out of me.But I have to say that the second semster is still looking good. I

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-11933631386360649542008-01-24T11:06:00.000-08:002008-01-24T11:15:47.444-08:00

Okay, so as most of you may know, today is my birthday (aka: My Super Cynical Sweet 16). Why cynical? Because I find that now a days, people blow birthdays way out of proportion. Sure, I like getting gifts and eating a sugary item of my choice just as much as anyone, but all a birthday is to me is a celebration of the fact that I have gone another year with dying, and that I am possibly one year

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-23419783621282734782008-01-21T16:42:00.000-08:002008-01-21T16:57:39.075-08:00

Okay, so for the most part of this little mini-rant, I am speaking from my point of view, which is that of a high school student, so bear with me.This is by far the crappiest time of the year. The weather is either a gross wet, soggy cold, or a harsh dry cold. The Christmas Holiday buzz is done, everyone is bitchy because......exams are coming up.How would you like it if you found out after a

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7724394837909524271.post-13721166911739915282008-01-12T21:35:00.000-08:002008-01-12T22:05:51.051-08:00

So I hate to, but I have to say it:Our generation is going down the drain, and FAST.In history class the other day, my teacher held up a cartoon, which clearly depicted George W Bush, Dick Cheney, and Condoleezza Rice. No one, except for me, was able to tell who they were, and what their positions where.Besides the fact that the USA happens to be our neighbours, they also happen to be the most

Chloe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14032028183655408860noreply@blogger.com1